A tanaga is a poem composed of 4 lines with 7 syllables each, which follows a rhyme scheme. We were asked to write one for our Humanidades class and it's due next week. We were asked to write about school or on being a student. Well, here's mine.

Parang sulat ng lapis,
Pag binura'y wala na.
Ang kaalamang nais,
Alam lamang sa una.

Does this even make sense? Well, the message I want to get across is this: that I only know stuff before and during a quiz or exam but after that, they go to the recycle bin. The way this works for Math is even more depressing. I only know stuff before an exam. We just had our second exam last Friday and I am not expecting satisfactory results. Why is it so hard to remember things? I'm not even that old yet to start having memory lapses. But then again, perhaps this is just a product of always resorting to cramming.

I wanted to write this entry earlier. I just didn't find the time to do so. Anyway, our second dept exam wasn't given yesterday. Our prof says she's not done checking them yet. The good news is instead of it having a total of 100 points, it was reduced to 80 points because very few were able to pass. Not that I'm expecting I would pass the exam now. I just think that at least now, my chances for passing the subject or at least taking the removals are bigger. Ok. Now, I don't feel so good about what I just wrote. I mean, what kind of goal is this?

Moving along, just a couple of days ago, I actually could have got something I want. Well, it's not something I've always wanted. It's more of, something I want at the moment. I'm not referring to a new pair of shoes or printed jeans or anything I can buy. I'm talking about something I cannot buy because it's not even for sale. The point is, I actually had a chance to get this thing that I want. But what did I do? I let it pass just like that. Why? Because I thought that if I did grab the opportunity but end up not getting what I want then, it would be meaningless. As usual, I wanted to be on the safe side. And now what? I am regretting what I just did. I should have at least done something. You probably don't get it. What I just wrote is pretty obscure. I'm not blaming you.

On this same day three years ago, the way the entire world view international security changed. The September 11 attacks which killed thousands marked the war on terror waged by the United States together with its allies. For this reason, September 11 is a date to be remembered. For me however, there is another reason to remember what transpired exactly three years ago. It was also the same day that we met our coach Lester. I saw him and Bianca today together with all the other Forensics Guild Members. Most of the people who showed up however are new members. Among the old members who showed up are Pauline and Mariel. It was fun seeing them again. I told them that I joined the debate org of my school and they told me to just do what makes me happy. Lester said I lost weight, while Bianca said I look pretty. I agree with both. I mean, I really looked different back in High School. I looked wasted and harassed every single day.

Now that I'm recalling the way things were when I was still a High School debater, I have just come to realize that as a college debater, I am still applying the stuff I learned before. The most important of them all was to "make Joe believe." In every speech I deliver, there is always that one goal which is to convince the adjudicator. The things I will say in the debate should be what the adjudicator will remember and consider important. Come to think of it, I can be a better debater this time since I still have what I learned before and I am learning new things at the moment as well. It's just a matter of using them all properly. I just hope I'll be able to do that.

Ever liked someone? As in like, like? You know, guy likes girl or girl likes guy kind of thingy. I don't know. Sometimes, I just wonder how it would feel to have someone you like to like you in return. I mean, I know what it's like to be rejected by someone I like. Anyway, I am caught up in those moments again when I begin to think that there's something wrong with me. When will I ever get over this?